the words of tim walker

picking up grievances

some people like to collect sports memorabilia.
others collect old gas station signs. (that’s for you, skip.)
and if you’re a hoarder, well then you collect a little bit of everything.

me? i collect grievances.
yep, you read that right.
i pick up grievances and hold them tight.
i’m mad at other people not for what they’ve done to me, but for how they’ve wronged, inconvenienced or imposed on people I care about.

someone gets on my list if they ask my wife to do something when she’s already really busy—even if she agreed to do it.
if that person has basically dumped something on her because he/she doesn’t want to deal with it, i pick up that offense.

and i don’t just do it on behalf of my wife. i get upset when people take advantage of people i care about.
i get upset when someone drops off their kids at my friend’s house, a mom who already has her hands full with her own kids.
i think another friend’s boss is a jerk because he’s overly critical and calls my friend into work at a moment’s notice.

no one asked me to pick up these grievances.
i just saw them lying on the ground and snatched them up.

my wife has a kind heart, she’s nicer than me and wants to help people. i usually have a gauntlet a requestor must navigate before i’m on board, but she is ready and willing to help anyone.
my friend, while busy with her own kids, doesn’t mind helping people out either.
my friend is grateful to have a job after being laid off for months. so an overly critical boss or crazy hours isn’t really a deal breaker for him.

but me?
i’m mad enough for all of them.

i don’t know why i take it so personally. all of these people are adults, and capable of making their own decisions. no one asked me to be their advocate.
even my wife. i’m protective of her, but she ultimately makes her own decisions.

and even if others are taking advantage of them, their hearts are in the right place.

sometimes i just have to resist the urge to pick up that grievance, and fight the urge to charge into a battle that no one is interested in fighting.


contents on this site are ©2012 tim walker. all rights reserved. i would be flattered if you would like to publish this content somewhere. just contact me through this blog.


image courtesy of flickr.com/creative commons/by by get it done!Macdaddy

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