not who i was
today is my 43rd birthday.
i’m really not ashamed of my age.
in fact, i’ve been sort of embracing it.
instead of hanging on to my youth, or wishing i was still in my 30s (i will admit, they sure were good), i really like being a fortysomething.
i feel like i’ve kind of earned something. that i’ve learned a few things along the way.
there’s wisdom. i know just enough to realize i don’t know everything.
and one of the things i’m slowly learning (emphasis on slowly) is that life isn’t always about the next thing. what i mean is there is a value in stopping and acknowledging, celebrating, even giving thanks when an accomplishment or task is completed instead of simply scratching it off the list and moving on to the next thing.
because there will always be a next thing. but there won’t always be this moment of celebration and gratitude.
so today, i would like to acknowledge that i’m not a twentysomething anymore. or even a thirtysomething. i’m not who i was then, and i’m really glad for it.
i certainly don’t think i’m a “new and improved” version. i think each age stage has its own challenges. but i’m less concerned at this point with proving myself or even becoming the ultimate version of me—and more concerned with being true to who i am.
i feel like my 40s have been all about that—getting to heart of who God made tim to be. everything up to this point have been clues scattered around as to who that is. experiences—good and bad. expectations that have been whittled down to heart’s desires. i’m just putting that puzzle together . . . slowly.
so today i’ll celebrate. there’s a pie homemade my mother-in-law that is waiting on me—i really love pie.
and the biggest reason i have to be thankful today is that while i’ve had some amazing opportunities in my life up to this point, my story isn’t finished. God is still writing it one day at a time.
here’s to another chapter. and a slice of pie.